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Katastrophe
Cast * Razor - Barry Gordon * T-Bone - Charles Adler * Callie Briggs – Tress MacNeille * Commander Feral – Gary Owens * Lieutenant Toby Furlong - Kevin Conroy * Mayor Manx – Jim Cummings * Fido Furlong - Heidi Shannon * Chloe Clawson - Patty Maloney * Robert Clawson - Arte Johnson * Catherine Clawson - Meredith MacRae Guest Cast (in order of appearance): * Dark Kat – Brock Peters * Mac Mange – Neil Ross * Molly Mange – April Winchell Supporting Cast (in order of appearance): * Alvie – Frank Welker * Guard #2 – Maurice LaMarche * Dr. Viper – Frank Welker * Enforcer Sergeant – Jim Cummings * Sgt. Smitty – Frank Welker * Ann Gora – Candi Milo Transcript Alvie> Sure you don’t want another donut? Guard #2> Naw thanks, Alvie, but three’s my limit. Alvie> You hear somethin’? Guard #2> Finish your donut, I’ll check it out. Hmm, nothin’. Viper> Now that you’ve had your dinner, let’s get down to business. We’re here to find Katalyst 100! With it, I will bring Megakat City to its knees! gasps Creeplings!? So, Dark Kat wants the katalyst, too. Well, Dr. Viper plays second fiddle to no one! Get them! Time to make my exit! T-Bone> What kind of a swivel-object is it? Razor> The new swivel-turret is workin’ great, T-Bone. It moves right with me! But I still need to test it under combat conditions. T-Bone> Combat? That might be sooner than you think, buddy! I’m pickin’ up an alarm from Megakat Biochemical Labs! Viper> Stop him! I’ll take that katalyst! Razor> (gasps) Look, T-Boy, who's that creep? T-Bone> It’s Dr. Viper! And what are those creeplings doing in there!? Razor> I dunno, buddy, but I’ve got ol’ snake-eyes right in my sights! T-Bone> Crud, ya missed him hotshot! Razor> My turret calibrations must be off! T-Bone> Oh boy. I didn't see that one coming. Feral> SWAT Kats! Razor> It's Feral! T-Bone> My brothers! Feral> You’re under arrest for bombing Megakat Biochemical Labs! Razor> What do you mean we're under arrest for devastating the place?! Get real, Feral, we were just tryin’ to stop Dr. Viper! T-Bone> Not to mention the creeplings and the Metallikats and the fungus-slime creature who was stealing the dead center! Feral> All I see is one burned-out lab, and two vigilantes! Razor> We're Razor and T-Bone are both vigilantes, so get real! T-Bone> Yeah, well beleive it or not, Feral, it’s the truth! Fido> Hey, you guys! Wait for me! Feral> Come back here! Lt Toby: (growl) ''That, squirt! Viper> Blast those SWAT Kats! I was so close to having Katalyst 100. Dark Kat> So were my creeplings! Until you slithered in! Viper> Don’t meddle with me, Dark Kat! Dark Kat> Viper, wait! Our little altercation has given me an idea. Instead of fighting each other, why don’t we join forces against our real enemies? Viper> You mean the SWAT Kats? Dark Kat> Yes. With them gone Megakat City will be ours for the taking! And there’ll be more than enough to go around. Yes, just think of it Viper! An invincible alliance of evil! Feral> Sergeant, put out an APB on the SWAT Kats! if they set one claw in this town, I want them brought in. Enforcer Sergeant #2> Yes sir! Callie> But Commander Feral, what evidence do you have against the SWAT Kats? Feral> All the evidence I need, Deputy Mayor! Cement slugs, and two million dollars worth of damage. Log this in, Smitty. Smitty> Yes sir. T-Bone> That should be dead center, Razor. Fido> Maybe, I could help. T-Bone> Not this time, squirt! You're too little to help Razor. Fido> But I'm a good helper. T-Bone> Not a chance! Razor> Guys. Calm down a bit. I want you two to help me. Technically, he’s Jake here since he isn’t wearing his mask and a helmet T-Bone> But you know- Razor> Get workin'! Fido> So what does it do? Razor> Ow! Hey! Whatcha do that for? Fido> (chuckles) Cathy> Yoo hoo. Jake. We've have a surprise for you. Jake> Hey, my parents are calling me! Robert> Jake, come say hello to your little sister. Cathy> Jake. Meet Chloe. Chloe> Hi, I'm Chloe. Hey, nice uniform. Razor> It's nice to meet you, Chloe. But, why thank you. I'm Jake "Razor" Clawson, This is my best buddy, T-Bone, and his little brother Fido. Fido: Hi, What's your name? Chloe: My name's Chloe. Fido: Nice to meet you, Chloe. Wow! Chance! Do you see that. Chloe is my best friend. T-Bone> I know, Fido. Boy, I wonder why does Callie's up to, Razor> I’ll get it. T-Bone> I already did. Razor> So what's new, Miss Briggs? Callie> Razor, I hope you had good reasons for destroying half of Megakat Labs. Razor> Several. Dr. Viper and the creeplings were stealing stuff in there! T-Bone> Yeah but Feral and Toby didn’t beleive us. Callie> He still doesn’t. So be careful. Feral’s after your heads. Razor> So's T-Bone. Chloe> Good call, Jake. Razor> Thanks, little sis. Chloe> Fido> Chloe> T-Bone> Viper> All finished, Dark Kat. Mac> Hey! Get your slimy hands off me, Viper! Molly> Yeah and that goes double for you, Dark Kat! Dark Kat> Such gratitude. Perhaps we should have left these two deadheads in that Enforcer evidence locker! Viper> It was your idea to have them help us fight the SWAT Kats! Mac> Us? Help you creeps? Forget it! Molly> Yeah, we hate the SWAT Kats, but the Metallikats work alone! Let’s get outta here, Mac. Dark Kat> I anticipated your defiance, Metallikats. So I took the precaution of attaching neuroscramblers to your necks! I insist you help destroy the SWAT Kats. Viper> We’ll crush them like flies! Mac> Okay, okay! We’re in! Molly> Just shut that thing off! Dark Kat> I knew you’d see the brilliance of my plan! All for one and one for all, as we destroy the SWAT Kats! Viper> Destroy the SWAT Kats! Mac and Molly> Destroy the SWAT Kats! Mac> Yaha! The Metallikats are back! Feral> Hold it right there! You two are under arrest! Molly> You gotta be kidding! Feral> Kats alive! It’s the Metallikats! Sergeant, move in! Enforcer Sergeant #2> I’m gonna enjoy flattening those tin cans! Aah! Feral> After them! Mac> Nice a’ Dark Kat to give us a new set a’ wheels! Molly> Yeah, too bad you still can’t drive! Mac> Ahh, stop your yammerin’! Think you can handle Feral? Molly> Think you can learn to drive? Feral> This is Feral! bring me chopper backup! Callie> SWAT Kats, the Metallikats are back! And they just robbed Megakat Savings! Razor> So, looks like who's disconnected them for a while? T-Bone> I thought we disconnected them for good! Callie> I thought so, too, but- gasps Molly> Hey, that was the Deputy Mayor! Mac> She denied our parole! We owe here one! Molly> The SWAT Kats! Dark Kat> Just like clockwork. Mac & Molly> That means you three! Robert> Now listen here! We're- Clawsons> Aaaaaah! Razor> Looks like it's up to us. Fido> And me too! T-Bone> You four should be safe up here. Robert> Good luck, you guys. Cathy> Take care! Chloe> Go get 'em, guys! Razor> C’mon, we still have the Metallikats to deal with. T-Bone> And we're los amigos del west! Mac> We were this close to flattenin’ her, Molly! Dark Kat> Forget about Briggs! it’s the SWAT Kats we want! You know what to do! Molly> Hey you think we’re stupid or somethin’? Mac> I hate takin’ orders almost as much as I hate the SWAT Kats! T-Bone> Time to derail the Metallikat Express. Use your Matchhead Missiles loaded, locked, and away! Razor> Right! Bingo! T-Bone> That tunnel’s too small! I can’t get in there to finish ‘em off! Razor> But I can! Launching the Cyclotron! T-Bone> You got ‘em? Razor> Affirmitive! T-Bone> The Metallikat Express is about to make its last stop! Razor> Sounds like ya nailed ‘em good, T-Bone! Mac> I guess Viper’s fungus-fingers have this SWAT Kat right where we want ‘im! Molly> Yeah, let’s finish him off before the others get here! Viper> Wait! Dark Kat’s orders were to take him alive! Mac> You happy now? He’s still alive! Molly> Yeah but not for long! Mac> Hey! He’s stealin’ our car! Razor> Looks like I'm the personal driver, huh, T-Bone? T-Bone> Aww, crud, Razor. Do I have to do everything myself? Razor> Huh..T-Bone doesn’t know it’s me driving their car! Razor> T-Bone?! T-Bone> Hey whoa, I’m the good guy, remember? Those are the bad guys! Razor> Let me take you down, Metallikats! Feral> Hold it right there, SWAT Kat! I’m taking you in for questioning! Razor> Hey hey hey, Feral, you gotta calm down first. Me and T-Bone can handle this. T-Bone> Sorry, Feral, he’s with me! Viper> You two have made a mess of things! Dark Kat> Fools! One captive SWAT Kat would’ve brought me the toher, but thanks to you they’re both still free! Molly> Sorry, Dark Kat! Dark Kat> Fortunatly I have another plan to lure the SWAT Kats to their doom. Mac> We-we knew you would! Molly> Yeah! You’re a genius, Dark Kat! Dark Kat> Just don’t disobey me again! Callie> I know you did your best, guys, but all the bank money was destroyed along with most of the Megakat Tunnel. Jake> We promised we won't be vain guys as usual. It’s not our fault. I'm sorry, Miss Briggs! T-Bone says Dr. Viper and the Metallikats are working together. Callie> You’ll never convince Feral of that. Manx> Callie? Callie> I’ve gotta go. Tonight’s the opening of the new Manx Wing at the museum. Manx> Ready, Callie? Callie> Ready, Mayor. Robert> Manx> Well there’s a new face. Where’s our regular driver? Mac> Uhh, he’s out sick. Callie> Whata re you trying to do, kill us!? Mac> Not yet! cackles Ann> This is Ann Gora of Katseye News, here with Commander Feral, who is demanding that the SWAT Kats turn themselves in. Also known as Razor and T-Bone. Feral> Yes, Ann, they’ve destroyed millions of dollars of property without provocation! Jake> Our million dollars? Holy Kats! Chance> Hey buddy, we saw Dr. Viper, you didn’t! Dark Kat> I’ve got more important news for Megakat City, and especially the SWAT Kats! I have your Mayor, his family and Deputy Mayor, and they will be destroyed unless the SWAT Kats surrender to me at sunrise! Come to the abandoned tuna factory on Megakat Island, and come alone, or you’ll never see them again! laughs Jake> Oh my gosh! Looks like who's in danger. Chance> Think Feral believes us now? Don't tell him for a huge dead meat. Ann> What do you intend to do, Commander? Feral> No comment. Ann> And how about you, Toby? Lt Toby: However if my brothers should help their partner. Dark Kat> The SWAT Kats are right on time! For their own funeral. Viper> So long, SWAT Kats! Mac> Good riddance! Viper> That was almost too easy. Dark Kat> It was easy, Viper, because my brilliant mind devised the plan! Mac> Guess we don’t need these two anymore, Molly! Molly> Yeah, we’ve been waiting a long time to settle the score with you! Manx> Now, now, now, don’t be hasty! Dark Kat> Wait! I’m taking them back to Megakat City! Chain them, my little creeplings! Callie> Let me go! Chloe> Razor! Help! Robert / Cathy: Get us outta here! Mac> Hey what’s the big idea? Molly> Yeah why can’t we finish ‘em off? Dark Kat> Because, I want a big ceremony, where these two personally turn Megakat City over to me! Viper> Don’t you mean us? I thought we were diving the city equally! Dark Kat> Just a slip of the tongue, Viper. Viper> Don’t make me sorry I trusted you, Dark Kat! Molly> I don’t trust either of these creeps. Mac> For once, Molly, I agree with ya. Razor: sighs Looks like these vain villains are trying to massacre my Callie, my mother, my father, and my little sister for a while. We missed our sacrifice. How about you? T-Bone> ''worried Even if the Turbokat got destroyed, We're gonna get upset. Besides. Who's gonna call 911? Razor> Hey it was either the jet or us, T-Bone, but now, we can get the drop on Dark Kat! Fido> So what did ya say, big brother T-Bone? T-Bone> No problemo! Dark Kat> Calm down, Viper! You’ll get what’s coming to you! The SWAT Kats!? Manx> Ahh! Am I glad tou see you! Robert & Cathy Clawson: My son! Chloe> Hey, Big brother! Callie> SWAT Kats! Y-you’re alive! Razor> Hey hey hey, Long time no see, Miss Briggs! T-Bone> For the time being, Razor's family! Fido> What took ya so long, Chloe? Chloe> Fido, you're alive too! Viper> So much for you plan, Dark Kat! Dark Kat> On the contrary, I anticipated this! Manx> Oh no, not again. Razor> T-Boy, Do something! Quick! Fido> And hurry! T-Bone> Stand back! We’ll blast our way out! Dark Kat> laughs Not this time, SWAT Kats! Razor> (gasps) T-Bone> What the? Dark Kat> My mega-forcefield bubble only lets things in, not out! I’m tired of this game, destroy all four of them! Tommorrow Megakat City becomes Dark Kat City! Viper> Dark Kat City!? What about our deal!? Dark Kat> Deal’s off, Viper, and there’s nothing you and fungus-face can do about it! Metallikats, give Viper his share now! Viper> I don’t think so, Dark Kat! Dark Kat> Fire! I said fire! Viper> Looking for these? [chuckles Molly> We made our own little deal, Dark Creep! Mac> Yeah, so long, ‘boss!’ laughs Molly> Your aim is worse than your drivin’! Mac> Aww shut up and get ‘im! Molly> You better shut up, too! Razor> Get down! Dark Kat> Time to end this alliance! T-Bone> Alliance? Where? (screams like a little girl) Razor! We’ve gotta get outta here! Razor> Yeah, I wonder if let's see if who wins! T-Bone> No matter who wins, alright. (imitating Elvis Presley and sing) You wobble like some ducks and you're sittin' like ducks, Baby! (Razor hits T-Bone) Ow! Razor> Shush! Molly> Hey! Watch it you oaf! Razor> Who is that? T-Bone> I dunno but we owe him one! Razor> Commander Feral? Fido> Toby? T-Bone> Don’t tell me you came all this way to save us! Feral> I’m here to save the Mayor and Miss Briggs! Lt Toby> And his family too! Feral> But as usual, you two are just in the way! Razor> Yeah, glad to see you too, Commander. Callie> SWAT Kats, look out! Razor> Everybody, move! Manx> Feral, Toby, Fido and the SWAT kats working together! Now I’ve seen everything! Dark Kat> Choose now, my villainous friends! Who do you hate more? Me or the SWAT Kats?! Mac> We’ll settle with you later, Dark Crud! Molly> First thing’s first! Razor> (gasps) Oh my, looks like I am gonna firing a terrible direction! Fido> You did firing in the wrong direction! Razor> Negative, bros! I’ve got those creeps right where I want ‘em! T-Bone> Speak for yourself, Top Kat. Dark Kat> Nooooo! Feral> Going somewhere, Dr. Viper? Viper> Fool! Out of my way! Callie> Join your friends, Dr. Viper! Razor> Not so fast, Dr. Viper! Do you think you can ask me a brand new contract for us? T-Bone> Never thought I’d see these kats all caged together. Razor> Yeah, it was almost worth losing the Turbokat to see this. T-Bone> That was an almost worth losing the jet this time. Feral> sighs You eight are under arrest! Lt Toby> Agreed. Dark Kat> If I lose, everyone loses! laughs T-Bone> Crud, the entire place is wired to blow! Feral> Move! Razor> Cutting it a little close, now, bud. T-Bone> Yeah, Cutting it a little close of it! Razor> Hey don’t tell me you were worried. T-Bone> No we're not worried in here today. Manx> Ahh, I guess Dark Kat saved the taxpayers the cost of a trial. Feral> Yes and with those villains gone. guess Megakat City won’t be seeing you SWAT kats around much anymore. Callie> Do you really think we’ve seen the last of those villains, Commander? Lt. Toby> Let’s hope so, Miss Briggs. Feral> But if they ever show their ugly faces again- Razor> No need to be vain, Feral, 'Cause we're SWAT Kats who kick their tails, and we're the triumph together forever! T-Bone> Despite the city has been saved. From now on, let's hope that we should forget about those troubles. Robert Clawson> I'm very proud of you, son. Razor> That's right. Me and my partner rescued my little sister for stopping Dark Kat, Dr. Viper, and the Metallikats. Cathy Clawson: Thanks for rescuing us, son. (hugs Razor) Fido> Thanks to my big brother, T-Bone who kicked some bad tails! (T-Bone gives Fido a noogie) (laughs) Chloe> Even you, Razor. I'm so happy. Razor> (hugs Chloe) Me too, sis. Lt Toby> Now that you mention it. I think Callie likes you, Razor. Razoe> Thanks, Lieutenant Toby. We did all of the teamwork. T-Bone> I need to talk, Commander. How about if you should loan us a jet until the city pays to have ours rebuilt or we should get a brand new job called an estate agent so he can sell a city for a paint job? Manx> The city?! Pay?! Uh perhaps a lovely parade would suffice? Callie> Mayor. Manx> Oh, very well, Callie. Happy to oblige, SWAT Kats. Now, uh, could someone please get these chains off me? Lt. Toby> (smirks) Heh. Sure, why not. Category:SWAT Kats episode transcripts Category:Season 1 Category:1993